Adee

Ito ang pinaka-una kong post sa Nomadic Thoughts at ito ang pinakauna kong blog. Dahil gusto kong ang bagong blog na ito ay tungkol sa mga bagay na mas personal napag-isipan kong i-post muli ito. Sinulat ko ito nung birthday nya last July 17, the very first time ever na wala ako sa tabi nya on his birthday.

ADEE

(posted on July 17,2007/Nomadic Thoughts)

adee & me 210 years ago today, I received the best gift ever in my entire life, my son Adee was born. I think it is but fitting that my first post will be about him. Remembering how he came and the happiness that he brings to me.

Adee’s story will not be complete without the story of my other son who was born a little less that five years before Adee.

On October 27, 1992 Andre was born. He was a 10 pound handsome little lad with the round face of my mother and the nose of my father. Words cannot suffice to describe the feeling of being a father for the first time. It was a combination of many things, the joy of holding one’s flesh and blood in one’s arms, the nervousness of not knowing exactly what to do every time he cried, the contagion of his smile while I watched him sleep. I loved his scent, I loved the way he grasped my forefinger with his tiny hands. We named him Andre.

The joy was, however, short-lived. On the day we were supposed to bring him home, he was jaundiced and he keeps throwing up whenever he takes his milk. From one hospital we just went to another hospital where his pediatrician was. The doctor confined him to the hospital for some tests. Tests, that were heartbreaking. My heart sank every time I heard his cry as the nurses drew his blood for some tests. This was done everyday to monitor his blood chemistry to what seemed to be forever for a young father. His cries turned to just whimpers and soon enough he got used to the pain that he did not cry at all.

Andre was later on diagnosed to have a congenital disease known as aganglianosis – total aganglianosis to be exact. This meant that his intestines failed to develop ganglion cells in his nerves and that his intestines were totally paralyzed. As a result his intestines were not able to digest his food intake and this is the reason for his constant vomiting after feeding. This disease was so rare that the doctors (there were 6 attending physicians) in Cagayan de Oro were not familiar with it. To make the long painful story short, my son Andre was slowly dying of malnutrition, not because of want of food but because his body cannot absorb the nutrients. He went through 3 major operations, a baby barely few weeks old.

A gain words cannot describe the agony and the pain of watching my son slowly go, ounce after ounce of body weight disappearing each day. His cute round chubby little body turning into a bundle of skin and bones and with countless punctures from head to toe from the injections and the intravenous needles.

Andre lived exactly 45 days. As he was gasping for air, struggling to keep himself alive, I held him in my arms and with a voice filled with surrender, I whispered to him that it was okay to go and rest and that we want him to go back to God because God forgot something when he created him and that we want him to come back as our baby again. A few moments later he breathed his last. I watched the pulse in his neck slowly become weak until it disappeared. It was like watching Andre’s back as he was crawling away. That was 5pm of December 10, 1992.

It took us another five years to gather enough strength and courage to try to have a baby again. We met Jinkee’s second pregnancy with a mix of excitement, happiness and fear. And ten years ago today Adee was born. We called him Adee because we wanted to name him Andre too. It was around 3am when Jinkee woke me up to fetch a taxi cab because she already felt the beginnings of her labor pains. There was only one cab at the subdivision gates (usually there were several in the early hours of dawn). As we got off in the hospital, I turned back to make a last check if we forgot anything in the cab. As I did, I saw the cab’s name painted on its front door – Andre.

Adee was born at around 5pm of July 17 (which is thewedding anniversary of my Mom and Dad) – a 7-pound bundle of joy who was almost delivered by caesarean section had he not come out in time. We named him Andre too. After a couple of days of careful observation, we brought Adee home. For the first time, we had a baby in the house. However, after a week, Adee showed the same symptoms as that of Andre and we had to take him back to the hospital. It was like a de javu of Andre. We stayed in the hospital for a week and to our relief, it was just an infection that he got from the operating room. The oldies scolded us because it was bad luck to name a child after a sibling who passed away. So with a heavy heart we renamed Adee. After picking names at random we chose Rafael Francesco but kept Adee as his nickname. All went well after that.

A couple of months later, I was with a colleague at National Bookstore. While i was waiting for him to find a book that he was looking for, I chanced on a book about the meanings of baby names. It quickly took the book and searched for the meaning of the name Rafael – “healed by God.”

I am not a very religious person but Adee is my miracle baby. I believe Adee is Andre who was healed by God.

Adee & me

A peep at my work station

Chuckie showed his very impressive work station and tagged me along with others a couple of weeks back. Di ako nakarespond kaagad kasi sineset-up pa lang ang mga work stations namin dahil kakalipat lang ng office. Hanggang ngayon nga medyo marami pa ring pag aayos sa bagong opisina namin. Kasama ko si Pareng Taroogs sa bagong room namin. Medyo siksik kami sa room dahil mas maliit ang bagong opisina namin. Bago ang lahat ng aming mga tables pinasadya to maximize the use of space sa maliit naming room. May veranda kami sa labas overlooking the street in front of the office with a nice view of the ladies’ dorm opposite our office. Ito ang intsura ng table ko sa opisina:

 

office work station

 

Sa bahay naman ay may study room kami. Nandoon ang aking desktop (na sira pa til now) at ang study table ni Fay. Kaya lang di ako sanay magwork sa isang study room na matahimik. Dito ako nagwowork usually sa round dining table namin sa baba na katabi ng sofa at kaharap ang TV. Marami sa work ko ay pagsusulat, medyo di ako masyadong nakakapagsulat ng matino at mabilis sa opisina (except kung talagang pressured na sa oras). Most of the writing I do at home sa madaling araw. paboritong oras ko yun sa pagsusulat. Tahimik, presko ang isipan at walang gaanong distraction. Basta may kape lang ako at yosi kahit medyo inaantok pa ay mabilis akong nakakapagsulat. Ito ang itsura ng aking work table sa bahay:

 

work station at home

 

Di ko alam kung late na pero gusto ko sana masilip ang work station ng crush kong si Ella (na may kalandiang iba) at kay Mine (na busy sa kampanya).

 

MALAS!!!

Minsan ang malas kapag dumating may dalang bwelo… hindi kuntento sa isa kundi sunod-sunod na kamalasan. Nung Friday at Saturday para akong tinambangan ng tinatawag na Murphy’s Law – if something can go wrong, it will – at ng kasabihang when it rains it pours.

Nagsimula ang Biyernes ko na parang ordinaryong araw, nagising ako ng 6am at nag-almusal (the usual – several cups of coffee and sticks of yosi). Ayun na nga surf-surf habang nagkakape, nag-simulang magtapos ng post na balak kong ilabas that day. Tumawag si Fay mula sa kanyang study room — BU!!!! Wala akong internet connection. Ayun na nagsimula na. Syempre nagtaka ako pareho naman kami naka wifi pero di nadedetect ng laptop nya ang signal ng aming router. Sinubukan kong isaksak ang wire ng LAN namin… wala pa din. Adjust-adjust sa settings ng internet connections sya. Naka-auto na lahat at binura ko na ang LAN settings ng UP… wala pa din.

Awts, di na ‘to kaya ng alam ni Selvo, tawag na ng reinforcement. Ayun tinawagan namin yung nag-aayos ng mga IT chuva ng office ko. Ayos! tuturuan nya daw ako ayusin ang settings ng router. Nagbigay ng instructions over the phone.

Naging parang may ka-SOP ako… Ahhhh…. Ohhhhh…. Ito ba? Bubuksan ko na ba? Tatanggalin ko? … Ipapasok ko ba? …. Ahhh…. Ayan na! Subalit nung subukan ko sa laptop ni Fay wala pa din. Hay! So balik ako sa laptop ko … nahulog ako sa upuan… pati laptop kong naka-connect ay wala na ring nadetect na wifi – sinaksak ko rin ang wire ng LAN – wala din. Hala! ano ‘to sore eyes at biglang nahawa ang laptop ko. Konting trial and error pa nakuha ko rin na makaconnect sa LAN – pero wala pa rin wifi. Ok na muna yon basta makapagsurf lang si Ma’am Fay para sa kanyang thesis over the weekend.

Tanghali na nun, kaya pasok sa opisina. Pagdating ko dun andun ang IT team sa PC ko kinakalikot – Naku sir sunog po ang memory ng desktop nyo kailangang palitan. So di ko magagamit ang desktop ko habang di pa nabibilhan ng memory. Ayus! Sabay lumapit ang aming magiting na admin – hihiramin po ang laptop nyo para sa seminar over the weekend hanggang Wednesday. Hala!!! Paano na ito!!! Makigamit na lang daw muna ako ng pc ng iba. Medyo kinabahan ako dun kasi namumuro na ako ng 2 araw kakapatay ng virus na Knight.exe na kumakalat sa office namin. Wala pang lunas para sa virus na ito. Yokong madisgrasya mga files sa flash drive at external memory drive ko.

Tapos excited ang lahat sa araw na yun kasi yun ang araw na naset-up ang internet access at LAN ng office. Abot tenga ang ngiti ni Taroogs na noon ay nanginginig na dahil isang linggo nang walang internet. Subalit… datapwat… ngunit… di tumagal ang saya dahil marupok ang internet connection… panay ang bitaw… talo pa ang dial-up sa bagal… tsk-tsk-tsk. Sinubukan ko rin ang connection ko… patay! Well, that’s life kako. Ganun natapos ang Biyernes ko.

Yun na nga kinabukasan pagka gising ko… suspended ang Nomadic Thoughts. Hehehe feeling ko para akong tambakan ng basura na tinambakan ng sabay-sabay ng sandamakmak na malas.

Simula nung Saturday napaayos na namin ang internet connection sa bahay. Sumpa ko talagang ipapaayos ko na ang desktop ko sa bahay para di na ako aasa sa laptop ng opisina. Na-lift na rin ang accidental suspension ng blog ko at may bonus pa ako dahil nakagawa ako ng bagong blog. Sana mamaya marelease na ang budget para sa memory ng desktop ko sa office para maayos na ito… crossing my fingers (kahit isama pa ang legs). Sana maayos na rin ang internet ng office. Eto nga gamit ko desktop ni Taroogs at nagmamadaling matapos ang post na ito bago magsidatingan ang mga tao sa opisina at magsimulang magloko ang connection.

Siguro naman na-abot ko na ang quota ng malas para sa buwang ito or better para sa taong ito. When you hit rock-bottom, there is no where to go but up.

The Nomad’s Journey Continues

I began my journey in blogging mid-July this year. Within a month my journey took bizarre twists and turns. I began by writing about personal stuff and about trivial things as I learned to ropes of blogging. Like a child who has just learned to walk, I began to venture into political issues and articulated my stand on the different issues of the day in my blog NOMADIC THOUGHTS.

 

Last August 8, I wrote about the Mahaderang Matapobre sa mga OFWs, a post that unexpectedly catapulted my blog into the middle of a brewing controversy about an article written by Malu Fernandez that many people found insulting to Filipino OFW’s. That issue went into a high gear that I found myself lost in the strong current of fever-pitch traffic and angry comments. For a while the Mahaderang Matapobre swallowed my blog in a real one-post-wonder fashion. For almost 2 months my blog became a forum of sorts, mostly for OFWs wanting to express their anger and disgust over the article.

 

Like all issues, no matter how HOT!, the Mahaderang Matapobre gradually died down. And the Nomad continued by writing about other controversial issues as well – the Erap Estrada conviction, the ZTE Deal. In between these political commentaries, I also made it a point to make time and space for my blog friends – writing about them, joining in their tag-games.

 

Today, I found my Nomadic Thoughts blog suspended for reasons that escape me. I can speculate but I won’t dwell on that. I almost gave up in exasperation and disappointment if it were not for two angels – MARU and JOJITAH. Sabi ni Maru – people like me do not surrender; talak ni Jojitah – ang mga tulad natin ay parang damo, kapag binubunot mas lalong tumutubo. Salamat sa inyong dalawa, mga binibining ubod ng bait, talino at ganda.

 

So the Nomad’s Journey goes on and as a tribute to my suspended blog the NOMADIC THOUGHTS I am posting some of its stats. Dapat sana ang mga stats na ito ay gagamitin ko para sa ipopost ko today sa blog na yun – a revisit to the Mahaderang Matapobre. Pero since wala na nga sya it is but fitting that I pay tribute to it. Here is an inside look at the Nomadic Thoughts dashboard:

Nomadic thoughts stats

Mahaderang Matapobre stats

Nomadic Thoughts cluster map